Cuckoo...

It has been three days since I got this nagging flu. Nothing major really, just annoying fluid running down my right nostril. It did my left nostril yesterday. My workstation is full of tissue paper trash. Wet ones. If there was no sniffing sound coming from me, others would definitely think I can’t stop helping myself on porn. How many times a day can a man get it good?

I could just let it crawl slowly down my nostril but I’d be tickled to death before it touches my lips. Wouldn’t want that either. Notice how easy it is to just let your tongue out and lick any savory juice on your lips. Mmm…salty. What juice did you say it was? Tomato? Oh, naughty!

I go to bed with a blocked nose. I wake up with a blocked nose. Sometimes breathing takes more effort. When I blow, my ears get muffled. Sniff…sniff…slurp.

There are times when I sneeze up to 10 times in succession till my eyes get swollen and watery, my face feels thick and puffy. Rubbing my palm against my face vigorously feels good but most of the times it makes me look worse. Kinda like having a terrible itch. Feels damn good to scratch but gets worse at the same time.

Does this sound more like an allergy attack than a flu? Either way it sucks!

I can’t possibly have bird flu. My daily close encounter is only with chicks with hooters, or some indication of sort. Besides, I should have body aches and feverish body temperature. But how much longer should I sniff! This is driving me crazy.

Sniff…