Snap!

“Razak! I want your report” barked the boss from across the room..

“Yah, I’m doing it now” Razak reassured him.

“I’ve asked two weeks already now and I still don’t have your report. And yours also, Harith” the boss added.

“I was not in last week right? I’ll hand it in later” said Harith.
Whoa...! That's not the sound of music for the boss. The last thing he needs is a lame excuse. Just say yes boss. On the double boss. Consider it done later boss.

Oh, and Harith is one character you don't want to have in the office or anywhere near you but that's a whole other story.

“You people never report on time. You have no respect for me! I have to tell you so many times, remind you, demand from you, no respect at all...!” said the boss beaming his foul mood up in the air, like batman’s and thundercats’ sky flare, ever so loud and piercingly clear, for all us corporate mortals to fear…

And as he mumbles his way back to his office, everyone kept silent for a long moment. I guess to reflect on the fact that Katrina has hit our office shore and how we should watch our steps today.

Wow! That was tense. I seldom experience the intense moment when the boss snaps on us in the office. I felt it once in a while over the phone while on the way to the office, running late and this is the time when my office mates feel the heat. And quite often my mates will revisit these moments and others for my benefit whenever I missed them. Come to think of it, I do recall some moments now. Ooweeeh... Blazin'...

He doesn’t bark much when he’s not in a good mood. It’s when you have no answers when he needs one from you, when he hasn’t got what he asked and when he sees any one not in their cubicle for reasons beyond his knowledge that he gives a grave frown, an angry expression and a spike of angry remark. However, most of the times, this anger doesn’t come directly from the things that we did or didn’t do. It often comes from other events that just happen to come up during working hours and not all are work related. Most of the times we are left clueless.

To me, this is normal. And it doesn’t last all day. It will eventually disappear after lunch or tea break. We can only guess the reason why.

“Boss is in a bad mood” said Razak with a smirk on his face, indicating that he knows this is normal and temporary.

Oh but he is shaken now. And he is immediately stirred to drop everything he does and get to the report.

“Crap, to hell with these other stuff. I’m writing my report first!” he said as he immediately typed, his workstation beside me.

For a moment there I was expecting a bark too, as soon as he addressed Harith. I was in the line of fire you see. That is also how he barks, most of the times. When he is upset and needs to bark, he makes sure everyone gets the heat. And the fact that I came in late made me the next immediate target. I’m glad he stopped at Harith. Boy, that would really flush half my day away.

All is good now, but we’re still feeling a little cautious not to step on his toe. I hope the day gets better. It’s Wednesday for Pete’s sake. We need the remaining spirit to last till Friday. Maybe I’ll hit the club tonight, being ladies night and all. Ah, a lady friend comes to mind and I feel like a lucky punk.


Morning Snap!

Maybe I’ll hold the idea of hitting the club tonight. The boss is not the only thing that went Snap! today. Earlier this morning, I was brushing my teeth and went on to brush my tongue as well, recommended against bad breath.

In any case, tongue brushing always trigger puking action, soft or hard. You know, the sound that all men in the household make when brushing.

“Ooo~wek~ergh!!!!”

Mine was a soft one but it sure snapped my back as well. Is there any connection between the mouth and the back? I know the spinal chord is connected to every part of the body but not in this manner. If it does, then I best watch my mouth from now on. Be careful with what I say so I don’t get a nasty slap. Be extra cautious when French kissing coz she might just pull a muscle or two in there. While I’m at it, I better watch my rear end as well. I’d be careful when I crap coz one wrong push could render me mute! How then will I cry for help, sitting or worse, squatting helplessly in the toilet.

Nah, that couldn’t be it. I guess I didn’t stretch enough as I woke up this morning. The slight but instant jerk in my system, early in the morning, cost me my back today.

I thought I could walk it off at noon today when I do banking transactions and lunch. Oh the nagging pain! I had to walk with a straight posture, literally arranged my steps so that I don’t give unnecessary pressure to my back. I have no idea how funny I looked walking with a backache. Oh heck, many people walk funny. Those staring and think I walk funny can all fly wau bulan kites. The wind is strong this time of year. Yank enough and something will definitely snap.

A long walk didn’t help unfortunately.

After lunch I found myself grabbing a Salonpas patch at the pharmacy, something old married men and sportsmen often do. But I’m no athlete. I’m not married. Neither do I get a lot of action in bed.

I’m just old, and my back hurts!