Jack be quick

Last Friday I was at a lounge/club in Bangsar with a friend. She loves the place because the DJ plays good music. None of that house or trance stuff. Just music you could move to, some new, some old school and some remix. A little bit of Latin salsa added to taste. Throw in some classic rock tunes and I’d be there all night.

She introduced me to the DJ as he was roaming the space in between songs. After a short conversation he looked at me and asked “Do you want that with ice?”

“Huh? What’s that mean?” Puzzled, I grinned wide.

“Do you want it mixed, and with ice?” he asked again

“Seriously man, I don’t get it.” I told him.

“Don’t move!” he told me.

Ok, I could do that. I gave my friend the most puzzled look I could muster and she said “He said don’t move. He’ll be back.”

Yeah I know what he said. I just don’t know what he meant!

We talked a while. Then came DJ Joe with a glass of drink. He handed it to me and I was given the next puzzle.
“Oh snap! What’s he doing. Does he want to clink glasses and say cheers? Coz I haven’t ordered a drink yet. Or is he giving me a drink? He just met me. He can’t be buying me a drink already? I’d be dead embarrassed if it wasn’t for me. Dang, here goes nothing.” So I took the drink.

Sensing that there was nothing else to do but take a sip I lifted my glass and said cheers.

“Hey, this is good. Coke and whiskey! Excellent!” I noted.

With eyes round and wide he smiled and said “JD!”

Then it hit me. “Owh! Oh! ... Wow! With ICE! Yeah! Thank you!” It was a mix of delight and amusement. I forgot that I was wearing this!


Well I never! This is new. I didn't know wearing the right stuff could get you a free drink!

DJ Joe, what a character! Smooth sippin' indeed. I soon learned that he bought his own bottle; for work and friends.

Splendid! I've found another place where someone knows my name. And that someone is Joe! Jack I've known a long time.

Fast but not furious

Ramadhan, the fasting month for Muslims around the world is here again.
Selamat berpuasa. Make it count, make it blessed, people...



How does that affect me?

Well, for sure, food bazaars will be everywhere in the evening. There'll be all kinds of food, traditional and international style dishes for starters, main course and deserts. There'll be loads of 'kuih' varieties to choose from, those are knick knacks or local tapas.

Then there's the late supper. An assurance that food will be available up to 4 am! Piping hot! Very convenient during the weekends, especially after football matches.

The pantry will be smoke free for a good month. Nothing like the smell of cigarette smoking to announce one's non compliance. I'm loving the fresh air already.

And just this morning the boss announces that office will close at 5pm, an hour earlier, giving time for everyone to get home and prepare to break fast at sun down. Good news. Ah, that means it's 20 minutes before I get the heck outta here. That was fast!

I suspect the journey home would be a nightmare though. Well, here goes nothing. Diff... diff... (Japanese for 'drift')

*Selamat berbuka

The pace

Remember ...

...how you were so concerned about growing up that there’s just not enough time to enjoy childhood?

...how you can’t wait to get over with school and start work so you don’t have to worry about coursework and exams anymore?

... how you gaze at a bunch of kids and admire their care for absolutely nothing at all?

... how you wondered where this relationship is going and how long it would take to get there, wherever ‘there’ is?

Exactly!

When was the last time you pulled over and reflect on how fast you were going? Or were you not going fast enough?

Where are you going anyway?

You kissed?

On my way to work this morning, at a long traffic light stop, I felt a slight impeded jerk forward, my handbrake was on.

“Oh not again. Who’s it this time” I grumbled as I looked at the rear view mirror. The woman behind looked concerned. She pulled the hand brakes and just sat there. That just means one thing; she doesn’t care and I have to make her.

The light was still red and I glanced to my side for incoming motorbikes. Clear. I got out and walked to see the damage. She instantly opened the door and motioned half her body out.

I looked at my bumper and saw no scratches, bumps and bruises. Oh well, it’s nothing. I turned my head toward her as she gave an inquisitive shrug, as if asking ‘Is everything okay? Are we cool then?’

What a way to start the morning eh? Imagine that. Not even an instant apology. Not even a fake ‘oh, I’m so sorry…’ I was pretty agitated so I gave her a cold look and turned away. If my behind could talk, it’d say ‘yeah, whatever, retard’. I walked straight to my seat. Soon it was time to go.

Huh? What’s that? I’m mean? Hell yeah. Try minding your own business when suddenly someone gives you a rude nudge on your butt. Better yet, get it pinched. And no, they’re not sorry at all. You’ll see what I mean. Besides, we were in the middle of the road. I’m not used to stopping the traffic. And by her looks, she won’t either.

Huh? What’s that? I’m mean? Hell yeah. She can consider herself lucky she’s not my type (read: I'm not amused). Otherwise I’d ask for a chat by the roadside. And maybe her number too. You’ve read bumper stickers and car signs that say ‘You kiss, you pay’. Well, she didn't have to. End of story.

Don't be heisty

Sunday 12.30 pm. I was getting ready to fetch my sister in law at the airport when the phone rings.

Lady: Hello, is this Mr. Agustus?
Agus: Speaking.
Lady: Uh, this is your office neighbor, our office is below yours. You’re a staff of *edited* right?
Agus: Yes, that’s right.
Lady: Yeah, there’s been a break in at our block. All three levels were burglarized. The police are here investigating. You should call a representative to handle the situation at your place.
Agus: Oh, ok.

I hung up. My heart plunged in disbelief. I wished it was just a dream. The conversation sounded faint. It was a good minute before I called my boss and relayed the bad news. He lives nearby and was the most logical person to be expected at the scene. Imagine that… I told my boss to get his ass to the office asap!

He called back asking “Agus, where are you now?”

“I’m going to the airport to fetch my sister in law. I plan to get there after that, in three hours time” I told him.

“Oh, ok then. I guess I’ll get there now.” Said the boss.

My thoughts were focused on the incident throughout the journey. My mind was multi tasking while driving and having a conversation with my sister in law. She must be exhausted from the flight and she must have loads to say so I kept the bad news to myself.

When we got to the Swiss Inn at Petaling Street, I told her that we would be going to the mall for some weekend shopping, if she wasn’t so tired that is.

“The mall is near my office. I’m gonna have to drop by the office for a while to check on stuff. There was a break in last night and I need to know what’s missing. After that we go to One Utama Shopping Mall.” I told her.

Here’s the good news. I’m so glad I bring my lap top home everyday. Some asked me why I need to carry the laptop around when I meet them after work. And why I must bring it back home everyday. I don’t really do my work at home. I just have personal stuff in my laptop and it’s sort of an extension of my brain. Plus there’s a huge entertainment value in there that I must have access to all the time.

“Do you have to watch it everyday?” Bert once asked me.
“Not really, but yeah.” I replied.

And now I have another solid reason. This laptop is my own and there’s nothing I can do about it if it gets stolen at the workplace.

Two CPUs were also taken, one each from accounts and marketing department. Some 500 bucks were taken from the petty cash box. And worst of all, my boss’s new Dell Laptop. Yikes! That’d make any man cry.

The rest of the CPUs were already disconnected and ready to go. It seemed to be a grand heist kind of plan. In the end however, they were left hanging. The burglars were interrupted somehow. They left in a hurry but not without making a mess. Drawers, cabinets, boxes and briefcases were ransacked. They must be searching for small valuables and stacks of cash.

Oh well, at least I still have my lap top. Oh, and I’m so glad I didn’t forget my digital camera in the drawers.

“What else is valuable on my table.
Oh sheet! My coffee grinder. My hand cranked grinder was on the table!
And sheet! My DeLonghi electric burr grinder was in the pantry!
Arghhhh! I sure hope they missed those…
Now I really need to get there. Otherwise I won’t be sleeping tonight. Sure they’re not that expensive. But they’re not cheap either!”

When I got there a few hours later, boy was I glad to see my coffee grinder still on my desk. And its electric cousin was still in the pantry. *Joy* The damage is minimal to me.

This morning I was rushed to set up two spare CPU for my colleagues and one old laptop for my boss. Now that everything is in order, I blog.

Eye see

What is this image that I see
A lonely eye staring at me
Big, brown, it’s kinda scary
It’s very alert, and it’s not happy

It stares up, and it stares down
It gives a weird sense of frown
Coz this is lame and I better shut up
It’s just coffee mud running down my cup

Sad day

I received a text from a friend saying Crocodile Hunter was killed by a sting ray.

I thought 'Oh! Not another prank news about poor Stevie. Last time it was a crocodile. Now a sting ray?'

I instantly browsed the internet and found several sources which confirms this tragic news.

Here's one. And another. How I wish this is just another prank.

Not a good day today. My deepest condolence to his family and friends. I will miss his antics. Watching his documentaries will never be the same again.

Farewell mate.