This left feels right

I was listening to Eminem’s ‘The way you lie’ on my way to work today and the line ‘as long as this wrong feels right’ carved a smile on my face.  I never really paid any attention to the lyrics because they kinda sound angry. But then again, I wouldn’t know since I’m not really listening.  I just like the song in general, the beat and the melody.

The line lingered in my mind and it reminded me of Bon Jovi’s album called ‘This Left Feels Right’. It’s a great work of art I must add. And that eventually lead me to my natural orientation or physical condition. I’m a leftie.  Not that it’s a big deal but it did make me more conscious of how I handle things with my hands when I was a young boy growing up.

When I was in elementary school, being a leftie was not an ordinary thing.  Kids would stare at me wondering how the hell could I write in that condition. My book was always in a diagonal position at best,  45 degrees north east relative to my chest.  My friends would tilt their heads to read my page, and I would return a smile.

The act of receiving things with the left hand is frowned upon by some of my teachers throughout my schooling years.  Yes, I know it’s right to receive with the right hand but when your left feels right all the time, the concept is not that easy to grasp. The mind tells you one thing but the body is used to the other. I still do it today but hey, I don’t really care.

Eating out was a rare but joyful occasion when I was growing up.  I remember going to the morning market with mom and we would order a bowl of dry noodles each, ‘kolo mee’ to the Sarawakians, for our breakfast.  As I was enjoying my noodles with a pair of chopsticks using my left hand, I noticed several sets of senior eyes watching me at the hawker noodle stall.

“Halo apek! Lu tak pernah tengok olang pakai chopstick guna tangan kiri ah?” were the words never uttered, though I was highly tempted.

I always got confused at the dinner table, especially when there are forks involved. Which hand do I use to hold the spoon again? Because when at home, we usually use spoons only and my left hand does all the work.  Nowadays, I prefer to take both a fork and a spoon. That way, my right hand is forced to handle the spoon and the fork is used to efficiently assist the right hand with the spoon.  Oh but it get’s a little confusing when a knife is involved. But I guess it has been okay till now, since I have never felt like stabbing anyone at the dinner table, yet.

Have you ever been told “Ew, that's disgusting. You’re a leftie…  you must be cleaning yourself in the toilet and feed your  mouth using your left hand…!”

If you’re a leftie, you must have got this retarded remark at some point in your life.  I guess we’ve gotten used to it. Not that it has lead us toward depression or anything like that but it hurts all the same.

Sometimes I am tempted to reply “You stupid bitch. We’re not like you. We don’t program our hands to do certain things automatically and just forget about it and ignore where it’s been.  Here, handle this rat poison and go eat a banana leaf rice with your fingers right after”

If she’s got the brains, she’ll wash her hands thoroughly in between. 


She can also be a he, a bitch as he can be. 

Sorry for the angry tone. But that was fun.

Today I am proud to be a leftie.  Guess what… my boss is a leftie. My heart smiles when I see him sign letters at a horizontal position. This man goes ninety degrees.  My heart sings with joy when he signs my pay check.  Whose doesn’t eh mate?  Some of my dearest friends are also lefties. They too write at a 45 to 90 degrees tilt. There’s even a world Left Handed day, August 13th!

I am not 100% leftie though, probably just 95%.  My environment has forced me to do things with my right hand, especially the new skills I picked up over the years.  I use the scissors, click the mouse and bowl with my right hand.  I admire lefties at the bowling alley.

I use the laptop’s touch pad with my left hand, it feels better that way. I text with my left hand, it’s faster that way.  I answer calls on my left side, it goes with the left hand anyway.  

And guess what, I pose for the camera with my head usually tilted to the left! Seems to me that my left side is heavier. Haha…

Heck, I could go on and on… but I won’t .  It think you, my dear readers  should be left to analyze which hand do you use in your everyday activities, especially the lefties.  And for the righties, you also use your left hand more than you think… like shifting the gear, even if you’re driving a right hand drive vehicle… haha… just kidding. 

But seriously…